Cheating…can you resist? Ask Kobby in the conclusion of this story right here (in case you’ve not read it yet). Enjoy!

 

6:00am, Valentine’s Day.

Kobby was in the shower, preparing for his day whilst Joy was finishing off with some light reading she’d picked up a week before.

She didn’t go snooping per se – no – but he’d left his phone screen-up on the bed as usual and she just happened to instinctively glance that way when it beeped a Whatsapp alert. She picked it up and was about to call out to him that he’d gotten a message from “Go Away” with a giggle when her finger unintentionally brushed against the sensor, unlocking it and displaying the racy selfie Charlene had just sent him in a smidgen of underwear!

Her heart skipped a beat as she choked on the giggle. The woman had captioned it, “How will I have you tonight, Naughty or Nice?” and that just drove her into palpitations! She felt her world closing in around her, as if the panic attacks of her bouts of childhood asthma were coming back all at once.

What was this?! As if she hadn’t paid her dues trudging all of the way down the Broken Road that had finally led her to Dr. Kobby Akorful, now this was what she was confronted with. Was he having an affair?! Her blood ran cold at that thought and she simultaneously felt a heavy hand squeeze her heart at the pain of the thought. Am I not enough for him? Was it anything I did? Can Kobby be this heartless and cruel?! These thoughts ran through her mind in a few seconds and it was all she could do to press down on the panic she was feeling just then so it wouldn’t consume her.  Read More Tempted to Touch II

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Living in Ghana, I think we learn about God firstly through a sensational experience before we learn about Him any other way. Maybe because your mother or father had someone pray over you and you were forced to feeeeel the Spirit before you even know who or what he was and why he was so intent on being felt by you.

You rarely get an explanation of who the Trinity is, what their purpose is, or who is who in said Trinity. You must believe because your father believes, and your father’s father, and their parents before them. And God forbid you be the one who doesn’t follow the path the ancestors have set. No questions can be asked, because how dare you question God?

Based on that experience, of relating to God viscerally before you can relate to him emotionally or mentally, I think, I think we tend to become slaves of that visceral feeeeling of God.

There’s nothing wrong with that though…right? How do you know God is there if people aren’t wailing and you not breaking out in goosebumps everywhere? And if that’s how to feel God, I don’t think I feel God anymore.

Read More I Don’t Feel God Anymore

Blog Religion

YOU cannot, if you’re not a person of colour, wear cornrows, or rasta, or even wear your hair in what might remotely resemble a natural ‘fro. You’re aiding in cultural appropriation, and it’s just down right wrong.

You can’t refer to baby hairs if you, as a matter of fact, do not have baby hairs. If you have thin long hair, that is almost the same length as the rest of your head of hair, you are aiding in cultural appropriation.

How dare the thought of wrapping your head with designer scarves even come up? When women around the world are being shamed for wearing a headwrap?!

How can you call a black person “black” and not a person of colour? Do you even realise how offensive that is? It is not okay to assume a person who is biracial is black simply because one of their parents is. They are actually a very equal mix of both races. That’s why they are called biracial people.

Read More You Must Be Politically Correct

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IT was almost Christmas and I was checking in with one of my girls, Aba. She was getting ready to make a trip home. She was, understandably, excited because she planned a trip the year before and couldn’t make it. I didn’t help by telling her how much she missed out. As per usual, we had already made plans and were ready to discuss how we were going to spend Christmas. We also planned for spontaneous plans. I know. However, Aba in Ghana always means something spontaneous is going to happen. Said something usually involves some man.

“Are you excited?” I asked.

“Small”

“Because all your boys are there,” I retorted.

“On the lowest key, I’m excited to get regular smooches.”

“Waa shr3, I know you too well. Kwame and Bobby?”

“Not Bobby anymore. He’ll be there, but more Kwame.”

“You might get married to Kwame.”

“Don’t even go there.”

“I’ve gone papa.”

“Haha. Hmm. Not unless he changes.”

“Oh please, you were there supporting his trifling behaviour, he’s not going to change.”

Read More You Cannot Do Better

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Dear sweetheart,

I don’t even know you yet, but you should know that I pray for you. I am slowly learning that doing so will always be a part of my life. I pray for your journey with me for nine months and how much bonding we’re going to be doing. But mostly, I pray because I am no longer naïve to the difficulties that pregnancy may come with. Therefore, before you are even conceived, I am praying that your nine-month journey is as smooth as possible.

This will be new for both you and I, and there are so many mistakes I’m going to make. You’re going to have to forgive me. It’s not really like you have a choice, you’re stuck with me. Speaking of being stuck, please know and understand that there will be times when I cannot stand your fearfully and wonderfully made self, but that does not mean I love you any less.

I love you already.

You’re going to have amazing years of people picking you up and biting your cheeks…Alright, that will just be me. However, once you get past that stage I want you to know this:

Read More Open Letter to My First-Born Child

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Who said romance and Christianity are mutually exclusive? Eh? Who said? Whoooo ssaaaiiiiddd? Show me his house and I’ll tell him something! You see it’s such misconceptions that leave our gorgeous curvaceous sistrenes at the mercies of R Kelly, Chris Brown, Taio Cruz and their sorts.

Answer me this, was Solomon of God or not? Don’t tell me being dolu and POP are characteristics of piety and don papa spiritoism. Come on come over here (Mortal Kombat style) and learn a line or two worhor worhor.

Ask Tele the advantages and heights his ‘Letters to my dear true wife’ has landed him and you’ll see that you’re doing yourself if the only vibe you got is…is…”Wooww sister Belinda, what a well moulded creation you are by the Almighty.” Come on bro! It’s not carnal to describe your wife’s body to her. In fact, it’s a very shpiritwa thing. So I’m going to show you what I mean with this made-for-the-mrs piece. Read More You Turn Me On!

Blog Poems

No, no, no. This couldn’t be happening again. Joy banged her hand on the steering wheel in frustration. “What is this?!”

She stared at the phone in her hand – Monique was now calling 5 minutes after sending her the picture without any response from her. She let the phone ring as she was carried away by a rush of emotions.

Who was this woman? What was this picture truly about? Was Yao really married? Like seriously?! For all this while?!

The questions were too many for her head to process on its own. *Ping* She received another message from Monique – Where are you, Joy? I’m calling you but you’re not answering, R u ok???

joy3-greetShe knew Monique meant well, but just then she didn’t think she could talk to anyone just yet. Wait – she cast a glance at the man sipping from a teacup at the terrace – there was one  person who she could speak to,

She stepped out of the car, her trembling hands finally settling as she closed the door before walking purposefully towards the restaurant.

Gino, the head greeter, smiled at her in the foyer, but she barely acknowledged him with a small wave of her right hand as she stalked toward the terrace.

“Oh hi there beautiful.” Yao was getting up to greet her with that smile that would turn her knees to jelly on any fair day…obviously not today. His smile faltered when he noticed the look on her face.

“What’s wrong, Joy? What’s with that look on your face?” Read More The Joys of an Intimidating Woman III

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“Get you a (wo) man who can do both”

I’m sure everyone and their grandmother has seen the memes with a person in some black-tie attire and some alternative, chill day attire with the caption “get you a so-and-so who can do both. If not, the internet and google are your best friend.

I’m thinking along those same lines, except I’m talking about getting you someone who can do one thing and do it really well.

Someone this weekend talked about the various excuses that Moses came up with when God called him at the burning bush. As in, he was just chilling, having a conversation with THE Lord God Almighty. Instant responses and all, yet he had doubts about how to do the things being asked of him. Can you imagine? You? Of course not, not you.

Iiiiiiii, on the other hand. I can’t say I have had legitimate immediate responses from God, a-la-Moses style. However, there are numerous times in my life where I have questioned how something that has been said or prophesied to me, or even something I have desired in my heart, is going to happen. I know, I know. You’re supposed to leave the “how” to God. However, I’m one of those weird people who likes to know how things are going to happen and whether a, b and c need to be 95 degrees to the left to make it happen.

Read More Get You An Aaron

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Joy was bored out of her mind at the stakeholders meeting of the Scion Corporation that Thursday afternoon. The Internal Auditor was droning on in his less-than-stellar English for close to an hour now and so her mind drifted involuntarily towards the bee that had been buzzing around in her bonnet for a while now.

 

The events of the date with Kojo 3 weeks ago should have been the last things on her mind by then, to tell the truth. She’d been royally pissed for over a week and even till now, the memory could still drive her silently steaming mad in a minute or less. The sort of male animal that would instinctively oppose any woman who appeared to have more than a cursory opinion on matters that ran contrary to his own was downright despicable to her, but one who would immediately assume she would welcome any unsolicited advances and therefore take certain liberties was the absolute worst in her opinion.

 

Where was that bigot Julius or the two-faced Kojo when she had to endure cold winters slaving away at a fast-food joint before moving to the Walmart afterwards, and then temping on alternate weekends when her Ghanaian scholarship was abruptly terminated?! It turned out that a certain Hon. Somebody at the Ministry of ****** decided to halt payments in favour of channelling funds into an election campaign. Thank God they lost, she thought to herself with a satisfying spike of spite that briefly made her smile.

Read More The Joys of an Intimidating Woman II

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I have the unfortunate pleasure of being in that prime age range where a lot of people expect you to be married or well on your way to being married. Ergo, a lot of conversations with people significantly older than me centre on the topic of marriage. I think this is in a bid to give me unnecessary pressure, but I refuse to collect it.

Regardless of this, talking about marriage a lot more lately, I get the opportunity to have interesting conversations about it and what it’s like. Considering that I intend to be married some day, I figure why not ask these people about it. I enjoy finding out what gems each of them have to drop on marriage. Majority of the people who ask me about it are already married and a few are divorced, so regardless of whether it was a failed or successful marriage, I like to engage them in a conversation about what they have learned. It’s always a fun way to flip the conversation.

I haven’t gotten as many “gems” as I had hoped when I decided to start flipping the conversation, but I do have an excerpt from a lady I heard speaking at a conference a few months ago. She wasn’t even speaking directly to me. I believe someone had asked her about her marriage and in her answer she said something that has kind of stuck with me since:

Read More The Ring Doesn’t Absolve You Of…

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