Eve’s Untold Story

story of creationThe story of creation as you know it is false! At least the part about how woman was created. Here’s the gospel truth;

Adam: God, I get lonely sometimes. And yes, the dragons and butterflies are all cool to play with, but I want me some brown sugar, you ge’ me?

God: Hmm. I feel you. You know what I’m going to do?

Adam: Tell me G.

God: I’m gonna create a woman for you. She’ll cook and clean, never whine, always willing and ready to serve you in all imaginable ways. She’ll be your back bone and your hand gloves. She’ll listen to you and never interrupt when you’re talking! She’ll be understanding and understandable. And her food, her food will be exceedingly worth rushing home for. Always! She’ll admit it when she’s wrong and never repeat the mistake. She wont cry and throw tantrums. When it’s that time of the month, she wont have any mood swings. She’ll never fuss about having the final word. She wont care about what her friends think and wont compare you to anyone else, and as a bonus, she’ll love FIFA.

Adam: O yeah? How much for that God?

God: Ooo just an arm and a leg.

Adam (in long deep thought): Hmmn….G, I dunno about that, sounds like an awful lot to pay. Okay, what do I get for one rib?


Me: Aaannnd…here we are!

I gleaned and tweaked this joke from a Joel Osteen sermon without compromising the essence, but I love this story! I just have one question for Adam;

What’s the point in keeping the arm and leg if what you were going to get was eventually going to cost you much more anyway?!

Anyways, I told that story because it shows perfectly how we end up getting back exactly what we put in. There’s no way you can put cassava in boiling water and dish out jollof. You’ve got to be ready to give much if you want to get much.

You cant give your man “me I’m a feminist who knows my rights” and expect the knight in shining armor to stop at your junction. He dare not sweep you off your feet lest he breaks some UN charter on women’s rights.

Same way you cant give your woman soooo little attention and expect to find her in the very same spot when you return from your Sabbatical. I guess if there’s any discontentment with something you have, it only means you’ve gotto give some more.

Just do it bruv, see what happened the last time someone gave just a rib :-)?

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One Comment

  1. Nathalie said:

    True, relationships are always give and take affair. But i guess the problem is who should own up to give first. Christ gave us his life, even him, expects us to give ours back to him.

    December 19, 2013

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